Huzzah! The first Springfield story I’ve posted. I’ve written another, but it’s still being fixed. Anyhoo, for those of you new to Springfield, it’s a town full of superheroes and villains and assorted powered and unpowered people. And some other friends and I have come up with all the characters, one of which you’re about to get to know very well (and for that I’m very sorry.) This is Lyle, originally of Bel Air, California, a senior at Springfield High, captain of the swim team, with the power of breathing underwater. He’s planning on throwing a super-scary Halloween party while the rest of the town goes about their strange ways, but we’ll see how that goes…
Ah, Halloween. For Lyle Macintyre it was the greatest of all holidays. Why? It was simple. His annual super-scary Halloween bash. He had invited the entire cool population of Springfield High—which, granted, was a lot smaller than the entire cool population of his former Bel Air high school. Nonetheless, he had planned on going all out on the party this year, and tonight, as he walked through his completely decked out house for one final check before the guests showed up, he knew that he had followed through with that.
Every nook and cranny of the house was covered in something creepy. Cobwebs hung in the doorways and windows, severed heads and body parts littered the floor, and jack-o-lanterns sat on tables and counters, their menacing smiles flickering from the candles inside them. He’d even gotten a few of those mechanized candy bowls with skeleton hands that grab you as you reach in. A playlist mixed with creepy sound effects and Halloween-themed songs boomed from the sound system. Now all that was missing were the guests.
The guests were going to be the most exciting part of the night for Lyle. He had made sure to invite every hot girl in the high school; even some freshmen, which was a social risk, but one Lyle knew he could overcome.
Lyle walked by a mirror in the hallway and had to double-take before he remembered he was in costume. He thought he looked pretty sick tonight (more literally than usual); he’d chosen to dress up as the Creature from the Black Lagoon. Not only because it fit with his power (he thought he was pretty clever to think of that all on his own), but also because the Creature knew how to pick up the hotties. Seriously, he’d learned something from that movie.
He thought all this as he looked into the mirror and the Creature stared back at him. All he was actually wearing was one of his swimsuits; the rest of him was covered in fake seaweed and algae. And he meant covered, as in head to toe. He had fake claws on his hands and feet and had even swung for some vampire fangs. His hair was dyed green, and his face had on some green makeup, normally used for witches and stuff like that. He was truly a monster tonight.
Just then, the doorbell rang. Lyle caught one more look at himself, gave his reflection a smug wink, and walked to the door. He wondered who his first “victim” of the night would be as he turned the knob and pulled open the door.
At first he saw no one. He was momentarily confused, until he looked down and saw not a girl, but a little boy, probably around four, standing on the doorstep. He was dressed like a cowboy and held out a pumpkin-shaped candy holder.
There was an awkward silence until a voice came from down the walkway. Lyle looked out and saw the boy’s parents standing on the sidewalk. The kid’s mom said, “What do you say, honey?”
The little one turned and looked at his mom, and then a light seemed to turn on in his head. “Oh yeah,” he muttered and looked back up at Lyle. “Twick or tweat!”
Lyle thought that if any of the girls he’d invited would have been here right now, they would have gone, “Awww!” The girls he’d invited were the kind to do that. They did it all the time at school when they talked about jewelry or clothes or whatever. And then Lyle remembered the present moment and said, “Right…just a second.” And he closed the door and ran into his kitchen. He’d completely forgotten about trick-or-treaters! How could he forget that? He’d have to sacrifice some of the candy he was going to scare the girls with. He grabbed the skeleton-hand bowl and went back to the door.
When he opened it again, the kid was just turning away to leave. Maybe slamming the door in his face hadn’t been the best idea…Oh well. He said, “Hey kid.” The boy turned back around, and Lyle held out the bowl. “Here you go.”
The kid smiled extra wide and reached into the bowl. Little did he know what was coming. When he got too close to the candy, the plastic skeleton arm lurched down and grabbed the kid’s hand, and the accompanying sound effect played. The kid screamed and pulled his arm away, then turned and ran all the way back to his parents. Lyle watched all this, stuck between shock and bursting out laughing, until the boy’s parents glared at him as they walked away, comforting their crying son.
Lyle watched after them awkwardly, then closed the door. “Okay, no more trick-or-treaters tonight,” he decided to himself and went to put the candy back.
Twenty minutes later, the party had officially started, but nobody had showed up. Had he given out the wrong address on the invites? Sadly, it wouldn’t have been the first time. But he was sure he gave it right this time; he had made sure to double check.
Relief sank into him when the doorbell rang, finally. Fashionably late must be the style here, he thought to himself as he opened the door.
Excited for the party to start, he shouted out, “Come on in and let’s pump! It! Up!” before he realized there were a small group of children standing in front of him this time. There was a Frankenstein’s Monster, a mummy, an angel, and…something Lyle could only guess was a marshmallow that blew up.
“Um, sir?” the exploded marshmallow said. “We’re not allowed to come in. Our parents said not to.”
“Or pump it up,” the mummy said matter-of-factly.
“Uh…hang on, kids,” Lyle said, his shoulders sagging underneath the algae. As he went to get the candy bowl, this time leaving the door open, he began to wonder if his reign of popularity wasn’t as influential as he thought it was. He returned to the door and held out the bowl, not caring whether or not the kids got scared by the skeleton.
But these kids were older, and as the angel reached for it, the mummy warned her, “Watch out, I have one of those at home. It’ll grab you.”
“Really?” the angel asked and reached in. As the hand moved down, she laughed. “Cool!”
Lyle watched as the kids all got their candy. As the marshmallow got his, Lyle’s curiosity got the better of him and he asked, “Hey kid, what’re you supposed to be?”
The marshmallow looked up to him and said resentfully, “I’m a sheep!”
“Oh. Sorry,” Lyle said. As they left, most of the children said thank you. The sheep did not.
Lyle closed the door and banged his head against it. Was this a sign? Was nobody coming to his party? Had he convinced his mother to go out on a date tonight so he could throw this party behind her back for nothing? Was he becoming, heaven forbid, uncool? Talk about a Halloween nightmare.
He was about to spiral further into the abyss of loserdom when the bell rang again. Desperate this time, he opened the door as fast as he could.
At first he was excited when he saw a teenager standing outside. But the feeling faded when he realized it was one of the high school kids he didn’t invite. As if Lyle’s thoughts of losers had beckoned him here, Seth mercury stood on the porch, wearing a huge purple robe and a matching hat. They had stars on them. Lyle was so busy coming up with insults in his mind that he barely noticed the little dinosaur standing next to Seth. But he did see something short out of the corner of his eye, and he held out the candy bowl in the vague direction of the little kid.
Seth looked a little stunned when he saw Lyle. “Oh, this is your house? I didn’t know that…”
In response Lyle arched an eyebrow at Seth and flashed his best condescending smirk.
“Nice dress,” he said.
Seth shifted awkwardly, but the little kid made his presence known as he shouted up to Lyle, “It’s NOT a dress, it’s a robe! A dinosaur wizard’s robe!”
Lyle looked down and met the eyes of the little boy. He was dressed up like a T-Rex or something. “Right. Have some candy, kid.”
“My name is Timothy,” said Timothy. “Not kid.”
Lyle ignored him and continued holding out the candy bowl. Timothy seemed very picky about which candy he wanted. Lyle looked back up at Seth, who was staring intently at him. “What?” Lyle demanded, spitting out the word.
“So…” said Seth. “What are you, a mermaid?”
Lyle stared at the dregs of the high school, unimpressed. He responded flatly, “No.”
“Merman?”
“No.”
“Oh.”
And then it got quiet. The only sound was that of Timothy rummaging through the candy bowl, completely ignoring the skeleton hand repeatedly attacking his own. Lyle looked back down to find that the boy had been taking not just one, but several pieces and sneaking them into his candy bucket.
“Hey!” Lyle said, pulling back the bowl. A few more pieces fell out on the way, and Timothy picked them up in a flash and put them up in his bucket too.
“Well,” Timothy justified himself, “I took a piece, but you kept holding it out. I thought you wanted me to take more.”
“Whatever, kid, enjoy,” Lyle answered, staring back at Seth, his eyes penetrating the weirdo’s until he looked away. Which didn’t take long.
“Come on, Timothy, let’s check out the other houses,” said Seth, turning away to leave. Timothy reluctantly followed him, taking a moment to glare up at Lyle before he did so. Lyle watched the two walking away, and then picked up a piece of candy out of the bowl and tossed it in his hand. And then he looked at Seth the dinosaur wizard and chucked the piece of candy at the back of his hand.
The reason he never played baseball came back to him as the candy missed his head completely. It did, however, hit the very tip of his wizard’s hat and make it fall to the ground. Seth glanced back at him with a pathetic look, but Lyle never saw the little one move as Timothy picked up the piece of candy and threw it right back at him. It hit Lyle square in the forehead and got stuck in his seaweed.
Before he could see Seth’s reaction, Lyle slammed the door shut and pulled the candy out of his costume, staring at it bitterly. He’d pretend that didn’t happen, and deny any rumors that Seth happened to bring up on Monday.
The doorbell rang again. Lyle stared at the door. It was that kid, coming back for more. That kid was trouble, he knew it. He was probably going to use all that candy he took as ammo. But Lyle had a whole freaking bowl full of ammo! He was gonna lay that kid down. And Seth too, if he was there too.
Smirking to himself, he pulled the door open and pelted the kid with as many candies as he could hold in one handful.
“Take that, suckas!”
There was one problem. Seth and Timothy were long gone, and the person he pelted was one of the freshmen beauties he had invited. He realized this too late, and the girl got hit by a handful of chocolates and fun-size pouches.
She screamed. And not the good kind of scream Lyle had been looking forward to hearing all night. The kind of scream telling him that she was pissed. Sadly, Lyle knew this kind of scream better than would admit. “I was gonna take pity and come to your party, you jerk!” she shouted.
“What do you mean, take pity?” Lyle asked, more concerned about this than the girl’s yelling.
“Everyone’s walking around town. Most people are at the coffeeshop and the boutique doing all the contests and all that stuff. Everybody I talked to said they’d rather do the town thing, and I felt bad, so I was gonna come see how you were doing. But now I’m leaving. Bye!” And she turned to leave.
Lyle had listened to all this with utter disbelief. No one wanted to party at his place? They all preferred hanging around with the freaks and closeted superheroes that Springfield had to offer?! He called after the girl, flustered. “Baby, come back! We’ll have a party all to ourselves!”
“No way!” she shouted back, turning around halfway to the sidewalk. “And you look like pond scum!” And just like that, she was gone.
Lyle leaned against the doorway, his social world crashing down around him. Great. Something else he would have to deny on Monday. What would he say when his friends at lunch asked him how the party was. “What party?” Yeah, good try Lyle, they would say. And they would laugh.
Letting out a sulky huff, Lyle slammed the door shut and began to take down the decorations. He hated Halloween.
If you’d like to read more Springfield stories (and probably better written ones!) check out The Art of Observation and For the Love of Truth. Also, if you’re curious about Springfield, you can look the world and the characters here.
